The White House is a place fit for dogs.
~ Dough the Obama Dog
As you probably already know, Dough the Obama dog is the first dog that Obama bought for the children. He is rather chunky and has not responded well to Michelle’s diet. He is therefore kept hidden from the public.
Occasionally, he will speak to me since he admits he is a closet Republican because they support McDonald’s Happy Meals.
This was a brief interview, but as the campaign heats up, he plans to give more. He spent the first twenty minutes complaining about Bo. He said she’s always on a diet but he likes to sneak sugar into her bowl. He laughed to himself when he said it because he said that she doesn’t know why she can’t lose weight.
One of the treats today was the pictures he shared with me. The above photo taken this past week shows Dough and President Obama exploring the $14.3 million pond scum reservoir that will hopefully fuel our cars by 2042. Dough said he is allergic to pond scum and hopes it doesn’t happen sooner.
Our conversation focused on government decadence and pilfering
On energy decadence and pilfering:
Interviewer: Dough, how do you feel about the $14.3 million going to pond scum fuel research?
Dough: I think it’s a good waste of tax money and that nothing will come of it but I heard my master tell some pond scum companies that they would make a killing and he expects some money in his campaign coffers for it.
We are also considering harvesting the methane in dog droppings. We all know that fancy schmancy Bo is full of …. that.
Dough then handed me a copy of the new Presidential portrait by a famous artist who is an Obama campaign donor. He calls the portrait, Reflections on Golden Pond Scum.
On taxing the rich pilfering:
Interviewer: What are your views about taxing the rich until they are poor? Why can’t the rich pay a little bit more to help out the government as they waste our money and increase the deficit spending?
Dough: I’m all for taxing the rich until they haven’t a dime left. I think the Republicans are making a mistake on this one. If we had everyone else’s money, we could all eat french fries, drink beer, and watch reality shows all day. That’s what Michelle and I do now but I don’t think she wants that cat out of the bag.
On Iran having a bomb:
Interviewer: Dough, has your master said anything about Iran acquiring a nuclear bomb and posing an existential threat to Israel?
Dough: I asked him that question myself.
Interviewer: And what did he say?
Dough: He said, What bomb?
On campaigning and pilfering:
Interviewer: Your master is obviously not campaigning. He merely runs from swing state to swing state to say hello to the people. Giving huge contracts to his campaign donors isn’t at all a concern either. I do have one question though. Has he begun to think at all about campaigning?
Dough: Yes, he mentioned it the other day. He will probably start spending his billion dollars in October. For now, he likes to use the taxpayer money to buy votes.
I brought one of his campaign posters with me. It is very current.