Gwyneth Paltrow’s overpriced ‘this smells like a vagina’ candle sells out

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Op-Ed

A  wildly overpriced $75 candle on the Goop website is called “This Smells Like a Vagina.” It’s sold by Gwyneth Paltrow and her business partner. If you wanted to buy one, you’re out of luck unless they restock.

According to Goop, Gwyneth Paltrow and perfumer Douglas Little were working on a new fragrance and Paltrow suddenly said, “Uhhh… this smells like a vagina.”

Hers or in general, we do not know.

Thus the name that has caused the candle to sell out. Little says, “The resulting fragrances are unique, rare and utterly extraordinary.”

Uh, okay.

People who like vagina candles, also wear them on their heads or bodies.

Now they’ve added smell and it appears to be a big seller. They are cashing in on disgusting.

Paltrow is a longtime ally of Harvey Weinstein, although she has since disowned him. She lives in New York City and pours money into our local Suffolk County race to defeat Rep. Zeldin so we are no fan of hers, to begin with.

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Don Philips
5 years ago

When purchasd on Amazon, the “commonly purchased together” item is Summers Eve Douche.

5 years ago

What did the blind man say when he walked past the fish market? Good morning Gwyneth.

Mad Celt
5 years ago

Bill Clinton says the candle smells like his cigars.

5 years ago

It’s not her vagina, read the fine print. Not even a skank could provide enough secretions to activate 500 candles. I’d be worried it sets off the smoke alarm!

Snarkles the Kulak Clown
5 years ago

I had some albacore tuna for a snack and it was delicious. It washed down well with a tall can of Brawndo and a Tarryleton smoke.